My staff discount finally stopped working.
Now before I go on to the very obvious and yet somehow elusive realisation that I had following the cessation of the working discount card, let me address a thought that you may or may not be having. Did I not quit that job many moons ago? Why yes observant reader I did. I fully expected the discount card to stop working by the end of the week and then the end of the month and then I just decided to roll with it and not ask questions.
I mean…we’ve all heard the saying “don’t look a gift horse in the mouth”? On the other hand maybe if the Trojans had looked a particular horse in the mouth before bringing inside the city walls then maybe they wouldn’t have lost the war.
Oh look, a seemingly completely unrelated tangent before I get to my point, I bet you’ve missed those.
Right so my realisation came when I was thinking about the shopping list. I no longer felt any obligation to shop at my old work. I’m not being disloyal by shopping at other grocery stores. I have a Woolies a ten-minute walk from my house. Have I utilised that store as much as I could have? Absolutely not.
Why? Because if I did then I’m wasting my staff discount. I didn’t matter what the difference in price was, not really, because I had my 5% staff discount.
…
Yeah look, I’m aware that I have issues. I’m dealing with them. Shut up.
I also got extra Flybuys points which in a way was a little bit worth it when it came to Christmas shopping.
I watched a Bo Burnham special years ago when I was hating myself in university and something he said really stuck with me. He was referring to artists and their fans and the whole dynamic of fans sticking by the artist through everything. He said to the audience that he did not want that kind of blind adoration. If he as an entertainer was not providing the goods, then he didn’t want his fans to stick by him no matter what.
If a show that you’ve been watching since the first season starts to go downhill, do you keep watching it?
Alright, look a good portion of us still would because we have issues with leaving things unfinished and need closure even if it’s subpar.
Okay maybe this will work with food.
You have a two pizza places to pick between. One is a bit closer and cheaper, the other has better pizzas and is more expensive. You’ve always been pretty happy with the cheaper one, but then they start overcooking the pizzas and they seem to be skimping on the toppings and this happens with every order, not just a one off.
You’re no longer happy with the goods you’re being provided so you decided to go to the other pizza place and haven’t looked back. You occasionally get your partner their $5 pepperoni pizza because they’re a basic bitch but for the most part they’ve lost your business.
I don’t think you’d have any trouble believing that one of the things that was stopping me from officially quitting was that 5% discount. As though it made up for the 12 years of abuse, threats, physical and verbal assaults, anxiety and guilt tripping. In this economy any kind of discount is worth it right?
So look, did I bring the big wooden horse inside and set it up in the middle of town when I should’ve been lighting it on fire when I had the chance? Yeah, a bit.
Did the horse suddenly become sentient and bugger off on its own causing minimal damage? In a very convoluted way, sure.
In case I’ve been in any way unclear, my point is this. Don’t. Sell. Your. Soul. For. 5. %. Discount.
Hold out for at least 10% and year-round, not just on holidays.
*For legal reasons, the above is a joke.
*For other legal reasons…Maybe don’t sell your soul. The hellhounds that get sent to collect aren’t your neighbourhood friendly puppers.
S.J Smith Books 